Day 18: Be There

How can we be there for someone we know? Often times in friendship I think we focus far too often on what we can gain and how we can benefit from knowing the other person. Friendship is about two people giving to the other person because they deeply care about them. Friendship is never one-sided.

Life was never meant to be lived alone. We were created for each other and to create relationships with other people. Relationships are the bonds that bring meaning to every day, and not just the relationships you can have with your significant other. Relationships with friends are almost, and sometimes are, more important than the person you are romantically interested in.

Friends last. They can last an entire lifetime and that kind of connection is too special to be ignored. However, friendship is not something that will come into existence without effort. We have to try to form a bond and it can be so incredibly worth it.

There will be times when we lose friends, I know for I have lost a few along the way, but there are some incredible people waiting for us just around the corner. We just have to look and when we think we have found them, we have to try.

Nothing worth having is ever easy, there must be effort and there will be pain at times. Friends do not grow on trees. We learn to trust someone and care for them by putting in the time and the effort to learn about them. Meeting someone does not mean we instantly know everything about them. There are layers to a person and the longer we spend trying to get to know them the more layers we are allowed to see.

Friendship requires effort, but because of that effort we build relationships that will last and will benefit us in so many ways. By focusing on the other person we are creating an environment of understanding, comfort, and unconditional love. We gain a companion that would do anything for us and we would do anything for.

If we are trying with someone who is simply not putting in the effort, it may be time to realize that we might be looking for friendship in the wrong person. There are two sides to every relationship and they should be constantly be moving closer together from both sides. If there is nothing coming from the other person, it is not true friendship. If the other person wants to continue a relationship they must be willing to give as much as you, if not more at times.

When someone really cares, they will do their best to stay in your life and if you care you will do your best to stay in their life. Relationships are about sacrificing time, effort and sometimes money for the other person because we love them with all their heart. I have quite a few friends in my life, but there are a handful that I would do literally anything for. That is because we have spent time building our friendships and getting to know each other. By building trust with the other person, you begin to build the foundation of a powerful relationship.

We must learn to be there for the other person. In the hard times, in the happy times, when you do not have time, when you do. Friendship is not about convenience, it is about being there for the person no matter what. It is about giving and giving because your love for them stretches beyond yourself. You care about them and they care about you. What a beautiful kind of relationship to have in your life.

Would you be able to say you have that kind of relationship? Do you have a friend in your life who you know for sure is there for you no matter what because you have spent time crafting that friendship?

If the answer is no, work on being there for someone. Put in the effort and see what blossoms. Friendship must be watered and it must be cultivated. Without a little blood, sweat, and tears there will never be anything of significance.

Be there.

Until Next Time,
Lillian Merritt